With the childhood and teenage years I've experienced I am always asked how I dealt with such a troublesome past. People ask if I have ever talked with a therapist and I said yes but, it didn't help me. They ask how did you overcome those terrifying and heartbreaking events that occurred? I say through prayer, and usually people just laugh. I just smile back.
In my life, praying to God is like talking to a therapist, but this therapist knows me inside and out because God created me and knows me better than anyone else. I may get laughs for even saying this now but, God is my remedy. He has been the only one there for me when I've needed someone most. People ask how I know he exists and is listening? I smile back and say because I've experienced Him. That's the only true way you can know for sure is by experiencing Him.
My first experience with Him was when I was 7 years old at a youth group center. I remember being horrified because I just experienced my first abusive situation. I remember being whipped repeatedly with bare hands from my guardian over the smallest of situations. I was handled in away it left hand prints all over my body. I remember being in so much pain, and being giving pain medicine from the guardian to help ease it away, but the discomfort didn't stop.
I remember not being able to sit down on the benches at the camp I was dropped off at so my guardian could have alone time. I remember a counselor coming up to me, asking why I couldn't sit comfortably, and noticing the hand prints all over me. The counselor asked what happened of coarse, but I simply stated that I didn't want to talk about what had recently occurred, but I wanted to make the pain go away. My counselor said all pain goes away in time.
I looked at her with this look in my eye like the answer was unacceptable. Then, she got up and left me alone on the benches while she helped other children at the camp. I burst out crying. I couldn't stop. I remember crying and crying in so much pain and so mad because it just wouldn't stop.
I ended up bowing my head down into my lap in tears sobbing away saying, "Make this pain go away. Please don't let me be alone anymore." As I did I could sense white figures around me and feel these unexplained gentle touches against my cheek. I stopped crying and lifted my head up and looked around. There was nothing there anymore.
However, I knew something was there because I wasn't hurting and wasn't scared anymore. I just remember feeling this uncontrollable emotion of unconditional love all around me. I figured it was something beyond this world. I called it GOD.
Remember I was only 7 years old and knew nothing of GOD. So, how would I know he existed, unless GOD Himself made Himself present that day to me by sending His angels and those vibes of great comfort.
I learned at a very young age, through a very painful experience, that saying a prayer is powerful. Prayers do get heard and there is something beyond this world that will and can help us when we need it. For me, I still call it God and as life has gone on I know it's God because I have experienced Him in more ways than just the one I just shared.
I'm sure some of you may still be laughing and in disbelief, but I dare you to pray in your desperate hours in pain. I'm sure God will be there for you providing you comfort and love even if it's in the smallest form until He can find you away out of the misery.
For me, not only did I experience His peace on that dreadful discomforting day, but I felt what unconditional love feels like. Unconditional love is knowing that know matter what occurs in your own life, that unconditional love is always there through good and through bad know matter what occurs. That kind of love goes no where. That kind of love is God.
